Dorion Mode - A blog by Robinson Dorion.

So last Saturday Jacob and I went over to our friend Owen's⁽ⁱ⁾ Peak Performance Playground⁽ⁱⁱ⁾ in Panama Pacifico for some boxing training. We hit the heavy bag for a couple 3 minute rounds each and then did a few rounds of pad work ; 1, 2 Mayweather, 3, 4 McGregor action knowhatimean ? Send it.

Anyways, after a proper sweat, we showered and changed and dropped Jacob off in the city on our way up to the mountain home of Tambo. The plan was to head up for a coupla hours, take some Kambo and make it back to the city all refreshed by mid afternoon as there was a big party I was looking forward to attending. Instead, the Kambo hit me like Kimbo Slice in some backyard in Miami in the early two thousands and I found myself in the Emergency Room in Punta Pacifica at around 10pm local time. "Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth." Here's the "receipt" :

So what happened ? Kambo is the trans-dermal application of the venomous secretions of Phyllomedusa bicolor, aka Monkey frog. Why would I do such a thing ? The idea is that you put it on your skin for 15 minutes and it elicits a strong immune response that helps one purge an array of toxins you're carrying in addition to the frog poison that's coursing your veins. They call it, "la vacuna de la selva". Typically you feel like you're being poisoned while it's on and you throw up how ever much you need to throw up and you're pretty tired for about 30 minutes after and then you feel great. It was my first time doing it, but I know some friends that have done it, including Owen, and did some reading on it and everything sounded and looked positive so I wanted to give it a try.

We got there a little after 12 and Owen stepped right up and took 7 dots. Basically the Shaman makes some superficial burns to your arm and applies the poison to the wounds. I watched and encouraged him as he struggled in the process, but held strong. He's pretty advanced with this kinda stuff. He's a nurse by trade and has helped design some clinical experiments/trials of intravenous application of DMT.

After he was done it was my turn. Before you "kiss the frog" you have drink 2 liters of water within 15 minutes.⁽ⁱⁱⁱ⁾ For many, this is the hardest part. The idea is the abundance of water in your gut helps to facilitate the purging process. As it was my cherry popping ceremony, Tambo's had in mind to give me 3 dots. Edwin, one of his helpers who knew me from the Yage trip, said, "Eh, he's strong, give'em 5".^(iv) Tambo asked me what I wanted to do and I said, "Le confio, dame los cinco". Here's the star pattern scar that I'm carrying, the closest I've come to a tattoo :

And so it began. I felt my heart rate rising and a tingling throughout my body. I kept a strong posture as I had been advise and breathed deeply. I threw up maybe 3 or 4 times while it was on, but the 15 minutes past by pretty easily. The vomit while it was applied was mostly water and after Tambo cleaned me off he said, "estas sano". Then the bright yellow bile started pouring out, a sign that I was purging toxins. It was about 1:30 in the afternoon.

I tried resting, rehydrating, having some fruit, some mints, some tea, some salt water, laying down, sitting up, doing some yoga, but I just couldn't seem to normalize. I had a lingering feeling of nauseousness and was puking about every 30 minutes until dry heave. Other people came, recovered and went. Tambo, Edwin, Owen, Inti and Maribeth in particular offered me lots of help and support, which I was quite grateful for. My mind and attitude were good the entire time. I tried focusing on my breath and being patient and letting it run its course. The sun started going down and by that time it was me, Owen, Tambo and his girl remaining. Tambo was starting to get worried. He was messaging his contacts asking for advice, which basically came back, "let it run its course". By 8:00 or so, he said, "you're welcome to stay here as long as you want, but if you want to leave feel free. Maybe a change of environment will help." By then I had probably puked 25 times and my breathing started to shorten so I decided it was better to head back to the city just in case.

So we made ~2 hour venture down the heaved mountain road and across the highway to Pacifica Salud, which is affiliated with John Hopkins. It's adjacent to Oceania, where Coinapult's offices were and as we were pulling in the thought occurred, "this is where you started in Panama and this is where you'll end". I could've just gone to Owen's and got and IV from him, but I decided I also wanted some blood work to see wtf was going on. By that time, my breathing had deteriorated substantially. I walked under my own power to the emergency room, but had to lean on the desk as I checked in. Fortunately, there was no wait and they got me into a wheel chair and bed in about 10 minutes. Believe it or not, this was my first trip to the ER.

I explained my symptoms in Spanish, including the frog poison exposure,^(v) to the nurse and doctor. They asked how many times I'd been vaccinated against the Wuflu and it felt pretty good to say "0". I made sure they didn't stick me with one^(vi) as they took some blood samples, gave me a shot of 40mg Pantoprazol^(vii) and hooked me up to IVs consisting of 10 mg/2 ml Metoclopramide,^(viii) 20 mg/2 ml Rociverine,^(ix) 1g/100 ml Paracetamol^(x) and 100 ml Sodium Chloride. I chilled^(xi) and let it run its course and after awakening from a light dozing realized the IVs were spent and my breathing had returned to normal and was otherwise feeling much better.

We called for the doctor and she came back with the blood tests that showed some dehydration and inflammation markers, but otherwise everything looked healthy. They hooked me up to another bag consisting of Sodium, Potassium, Chloride, CO2, Creatine, Nitrogen and Glucose to cure the dehydration. That ran through quick and after two hours in the hospital and $391.53 I was on my way home laughing it off. I told Owen, "how's that for a bonding experience ?"

Apart from that scare at Brighton Beach in St. Vincent, this was probably my closest encounter with death and certainly one I had most time to think about "under the gun". I'm pleased to report I was quite calm throughout. It helped that I was in resourceful hands the whole time and I'm quite grateful to everyone that helped.

The experience gave me a glimpse of what I'm made of, for better and worse. I think part of the reason I had the reaction was because my immune system was compromised prior from some of my habits.^(xii) Also, it humbled my ego and showed me the value of running my own race and taking things slowly as a n00b. Tambo and others tried apologizing and expressed some lamentations for my suffering, but I assured them while I appreciated the sentiment, I was fully responsible, from the state I was in when I showed up to taking the 5 dots and that I was grateful for the opportunity and their support.

I woke up the next morning feeling pretty good and have had a solid week in the aftermath. I'm grateful for the experience and in the end I suppose it's better to have a slightly stronger experience you live to tell about than a weak one that barely registers because at least with the former there's more to learn. Like life, and Eulora, "Learning is not compulsory. Neither is survival," and "The most you can hope for is ending up with the right regrets." We're all going to die and so is everyone we know, don't know, love and hate. There's no point in being sad or scared about it because it is what it is and the fact we can consider it separates us from the beasts of the field. While we may employ culture to control the moment of death, I think it's helpful to consider our ultimate fate, amore fati and ensure that we're not so afraid of it that we forget to live because, vanitas vanitatum, omnia vanitas and all that.

From the abyss, life ! Cheers !

1. Tru story. I originally met Owen in 2021 because he was neighbors with one of the biggest Bitcoin OTC brokers in Panama. Owen named his WiFi network "Bitcoin FTW" and at first the broker thought a neighbor was trolling him until he walked out this his balcony and looked next door to see Owen and asked, "Bitcoin ?" And then he started coming to some events and that's how we know each other. [^]
2. I it coined that because his house is stocked with exercise capital. He did have a blow up tub we used to fill with ice for ice baths to kick things off until his wife's pet rabbit chewed a hole in it. I told him I could "take care of it" for him, as my avatar on this blog can attest, but apparently she has some PTSD he doesn't want to trigger because when she was a child her father decided he'd turn her pet rabbit into soup. [^]
3. On top of that, you have to have been fasting for at least 6 hours prior. At that time I was on a 24 hour fast, which was no big deal given my experience. [^]
4. He took 9 himself. [^]
5. Though I didn't tell'em exactly how I was exposed, I just told'em I touched one. Snitches get stitches and all that. Why am I writing it out now ? Well, everything is good and I don't think anyone's going to really care anyways, but my thought at the time was I'm not some victim so don't even hint at laying blame on anyone. [^]
6. Trust, but verify, amirite ? [^]
7. For nausea. [^]
8. For nausea. [^]
9. Muscle relaxant. [^]
10. Pain relief. [^]
11. It was freakin' cold in there and I had to ask for another blanket. I asked Owen how much they spend a day on electricity and he burst out, "A BILLION !! They don't give a fuck, bro !!" To which we both laughed. [^]
12. When I went to VT I had declared it was smoking season and had been puffing tobacco and some ganja at rate much higher than normal. Not that I partake in either regularly, sometimes months or years pass without either, but like I said, 'twas the season. [^]