Tribal Ritual In Britain Leads To Injuries After Rabbi Tosses Lithium Ion Batteries In Fire

Thirty attendees were injured in London during a bonfire celebrating the Jewish holiday of Lag BaOmer. One of the tribal elders reportedly threw smartphones containing lithium ion batteries into the fire as a warning against their "evils" shortly before an explosion erupted from the fire causing 10 injuries with a further 20 injuries coming in the stampede that followed. The tribal elder apparently neglected to heed warnings about the evil within phone batteries triggered by immersion in fire.

Russian Air Defense Hardware Getting Pretty Good At Intercepting US Missiles

Overnight the US, Airstrip One, and France launched missile strikes against Syria which were condemned by both the Russians and Chinese. Out of 103 missiles launched, 71 were reportedly intercepted leaving 32 to strike targets. This move comes 373 days after Trump last directed US cruise missiles towards a Syrian airbase's pussy. Syria and Russia are reporting that this attack was "absorbed" with personel having been withdrawn from the target sites days in advance while the US insists no warning of the attack was offered.

Gun Free London's Murder Rate Passes New York And Reaches For Detroit

Stabbings in London have taken Airstrip One's capital past New York and on towards Detroit as murder rises the city (archived). The British response to the surge in violence has been to consider banning businesses from delivering knives to residencial addresses and charging a man who defended himself during a break in with murder because his assailant happened to have died after being repelled in a successful defense of the residence (archived). The murder charges are likely an effort to boost the murder conviction rate because that man defending his home was one of the few the police could identify as having stabbed another person.

Between increasing domestic challenges and pending fallout from inciting international aggression beyond their station, Britain continues to become more like Somalia than any historical Britain since the advent of sail.

British Government Lab Admits No Evidence For Scandal Used To Blow Up Diplomatic Relations And Court European Sympathy

Today Airstrip One's Porton Down defense laboratory admits it has no evidence to support loud Pantsuit allegations that the nerve agent used to poison a British double-agent came from Russia (archived). This news comes despite the government of the not so United Kingdom using the incident to blow up relations with Russia while fishing for solidarity with the continental Europeans whose Union the Brits will be leaving.

Despite the usual pantsuit media organs insisting Russia must have done it, the ready baked pantsuit public relations campaign accompanying the incident lacks an innocent look on its surface.

Ecuador Cuts Communications From Assange As Brits Go On Tilt

The Embassy of Ecuador in London has cut off communications between Julian Assange and the outside world following pressure from NATO member states. Recently the sublethal poisoning of a British Spy in London with a common nerve agent has been used as a pretext for the United Kingdom to pressure its allies into isolating Russia and other percieved enemies. The full text of Ecuador's announcement is below:

COMUNICADO OFICIAL

28 de marzo de 2018

EL GOBIERNO DE ECUADOR SUSPENDE LAS COMUNICACIONES DE JULIAN ASSANGE

El Gobierno de Ecuador suspendió de los sistemas que permiten a Julian Assange comunicarse con el exterior desde la embajada ecuatoriana en Londres, en donde el ciudadano permanece en situación de protección internacional desde hace seis años debido al riesgo que corre su vida e integridad.

La medida fue adoptada ante el incumplimiento por parte de Assange del compromiso escrito que asumió con el Gobierno a finales de 2017, por el que se obligaba a no emitir mensajes que supusieran una injerencia en relación a otros Estados.

El Gobierno de Ecuador advierte de que el comportamiento de Assange, con sus mensajes a través de las redes sociales, pone en riesgo las buenas relaciones que el país mantiene con Reino Unido, con el resto de los Estados de la Unión Europea y otras naciones. Por todo ello, para prevenir potenciales perjuicios, la embajada en Londres interrumpió este 27 de marzo las comunicaciones al exterior a las que tiene acceso Assange.

El Ejecutivo mantiene además abiena la vía a la adopción de nuevas medidas ante el incumplimiento del compromiso por parte de Assange.

Nationalist Dissident Group Leadership Incarcerated In Britain

Paul Golding and Jayda Fransen, leaders of the British Nationalist dissident group "Britain First" have been sentenced to spend 18 and 36 weeks respectively incarcerated for "anti-religious" hate crimes. The two were accused of spreading "hostility towards muslims" for bringing publicity to a "gang rape" trial. The kangaroo court further alleged the two engaged in abusive behavior towards circus bureacrats during their own trial.

Dublin Looters Destroy Grocery Store

lidlLooters in Dublin, Ireland appropriated a piece of construction equipment and removed structural material from a Lidl grocery store to achieve ingress and egress from the premises (archived). Reports out of Ireland and Airstrip One suggest a state of chaos amid routine winter weather self declared local authorities are apparently no longer capable of handling.

Very Cold Britain Running Out Of Natural Gas

Britain's natural gas grid operators issued a warming that on this very day they will not have enough natural gas to meet heating demand in the middle of a stretch of severe winter weather. The numbers offered by the fellows issuing the warning on the day of the crisis are a shortfall of 54 million cubic metres or 14% less gas on hand than Britain needs today (archived).

Poor Brits Evacuated From Their Warehousing In Green Incinerators

Following a 30 minute apartment tower to oven conversion earlier this month which claimed at least 79 lives, thousands of impoverished Brits are being evacuated from their government sponsored storage. The Grenfell inferno that triggered the current round of evacuations was fed by flammable insulating foam cladding applied to the exterior of the building in the name of "Green" energy conservation.

As of this writing more than 4,000 people have been made internal refugees of the United Kingdom due to the government's disregard for fire safety as it pursued it's "Green" efficiency fetish while remodelling the facilities that once stored these new refugees. The type of insulation which converted the Grenfell tower to an oven is banned in high rise applications outside the United Kingdom for fire safety reasons, and is at least nominally banned inside the United Kingdom as well.

Prime Minister Theresa May has not answered whether the Government was aware it had banned the sort of flammable cladding applied to its warehouses for the poor. May, whose government has now been saddled with the expense of catching up on deferred maintenance on an emergency basis for these warehouses, further insisted that Airstrip One no es un pais pobre.