Category Archives: Fiat/BTC interfaces

Fenton Taking Leave Of Vessenes' Fundnation Corpse

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Bruce Fenton (WOT:nonperson) has announced on the Bitcoin core client fork's slack channel that he will be resigning his position as director of Vessenes' Fundnation1 in 2 months. When the news started making the rounds on social media, he quickly added he might stay if he had assistance or funding, leading to speculation the announcement is a last-ditch attempt to scam more gullible redditors out of money. The Vessenes' Fundnation blew through 5800 BTC in 2014 and have repeatedly balked at releasing financials and transparency reports on their website. Despite repeated appeals to the public to help him revive the failed organization, it seems no one can figure out what the Vessenes' Fundnation actually is good for besides handing out out fancy titles and harboring failed child stars and alleged child fuckers like Brock Pierce (WOT:nonperson).

  1. Also known as the organization fraudulently misrepresenting itself as the actual Bitcoin Foundation  ↩

Mere 265 Bitcoin Sell Causes Flashcrash At Coinbase, Chronically Thin Orderbook To Blame

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Woe Unto TheeThe reported price at fiat/Bitcoin interface Coinbase almost exactly one hundred United States dollars per Bitcoin after a single sell of 265 Bitcoins demolished their orderbook. The Coinbase "exchange" like the Winkelvii (WOT:nonpeople, possibly arbuscular mycorrhizal organisms) operated Gemini exchange manifests a hypothesis made famous by the late American philosopher Yogi Berra that a venue can be so popular no one patronizes it. Coinbase exchange and anything the Winkelvii touch generate substantial lamestream attention creating an appearance of popularity, but incidents where people actually try to use these platforms to trade seriously reveal that there actually isn't anyone using the places to conduct their business.

Bitfinex Pays Protection Money To US CFTC

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The United States Commodity and Futures Trading Commission announced that it has secured $75,000 in protection money from shambling forum scam Bitfinex. The pretext behind this payment is that Bitfinex participated in a sort of transaction the CFTC frowns upon implying its other business at this time has the tacit approval of this organ of the criminal gang in Washington, DC. In the past the CFTC has repeatedly tried to insist it has a place in Bitcoin in spite of all actual evidence to the contrary.1

  1. This evidence includes asserting its will over Bitfinex, the shambling forum scam that succeeded Mt Gox and Bitstamp as the shambling forum scam of choice as its predecessors have withered. Bitfinex will likely be succeeded in this role as well, but the next shambling forum scam to takes its place has yet to be determined.  ↩

Spread Between Chinese And Other Exchanges Settles With Dollar Lower Against Bitcoin

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The recent spread event between Chinese and other fiat/Bitcoin interfaces which took the price of the United States dollar to nearly a two year low versus Bitcoin has settled with the interfaces reporting roughly a hundred more United States dollars required to acquire a Bitcoin than it did one week ago. Up until this latest Chinese run the number of dollars required to get a Bitcoin had been remarkably stable in the 400s ever since they were remarkably stable in the 200s. Forecasts place the next subsidy halving just 39 days into the future which is likely to place further financial strain on the mining sector. As always Qntra recommends HODL as the best course of action for your psychological, spiritual, and financial well being. Sorry for your loss, but this halving train is a coming round the bend.

Former Governors Johnson And Weld Compose US Libertarian Party Ticket

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At the United States Libertarian party convention in Orlando, Florida former New Mexico Governor Gary Johnson (WOT:unknown/undisclosed) and former Massachusetts governor William Weld (WOT:unknown/undisclosed) secured the party's presidential and vice presidential nominations. Johnson and Weld both served as two term governors in their respective states easily winning during their re-election campaigns. This gives them both greater executive experience in government than Major Socialist party likely nominee Hilary Rodham-Clinton (WOT:nonperson) or Minor Socialist party presumptive nominee Donald Trump-Clinton (WOT:nonperson) possesses. In national polls against Hilary Rodham-Clinton and Donald Trump-Clinton Johnson manages to consistently draw ten percent of likely voters to his ticket.

As promising as this development is it only reduces the near certainty that the next United States president will be a Clinton by the smallest of margins. Notable candidates present at the Libertarian Party convention who Johnson defeated include Vermin Supreme (WOT:unknown/undisclosed), John McAfee (WOT:nonperson), Austin Petersen (WOT:unknown/undisclosed), and Darryl Perry (WOT:unknown/undisclosed).

Self Propagating Ransomware Arrives

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Microsoft is raising the alarm on the latest threat it opened its customers to: Zcryptor, a new ransomware product with self propagation features. Zcryptor is capable of deploying itself to shared network drives and portable storage devices accessible from an infected machine. Zcryptor also allows infected machines to be used as part of a DDoS gang for additional monetization opportunities. Once again ransomware seems to be leading other accessory industries surrounding Bitcoin in product improvement.

US dollar Falls Against Bitcoin In Move Lead By Chinese Trading

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The value of the United States dollar has been falling sharply over the past week as evidenced by prices reported by various exchanges. Compare today:

gribble: Bitstamp BTCUSD last: 515.98, vol: 12731.63597753 | BTC-E BTCUSD last: 504.248, vol: 15287.34937 | Bitfinex BTCUSD last: 525.01, vol: 78077.20951914 | CampBX BTCUSD last: 455.0, vol: 8.61002736 | BTCChina BTCUSD last: 582.162181, vol: 98456.32250000 | Kraken BTCUSD last: 523.412, vol: 5386.22732809 | Bitcoin-Central BTCUSD last: 489.06, vol: 175.11466033 | Volume-weighted last average: (1 more message)
gribble: 549.658128339

To May 27th:

gribble: Bitstamp BTCUSD last: 470.26, vol: 12079.16275283 | BTC-E BTCUSD last: 467.8, vol: 12941.60984 | CampBX BTCUSD last: 451.0, vol: 4.26073272 | BTCChina BTCUSD last: 496.321332, vol: 74752.45100000 | Kraken BTCUSD last: 470.9, vol: 1744.79227392 | Bitcoin-Central BTCUSD last: 471.5728, vol: 209.9632246 | Volume-weighted last average: 489.10970125

Notice from today's report that Chinese trading is leading this devaluation of the United States dollar. Chinese traders have also been substantially divesting from non-dollar United States assets at an accelerating rate for the past several years. Sorry for your loss.

Altcoin Exchange Hacked, Claims $2 Million United States dollars Lost

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Hong Kong altcoin exchange Gatecoin has reportedly been hacked resulting in nearly $2 Million USD in cryptocurrency missing. A statement posted today on their website stated:

"In total, the hot wallet breach resulted in the loss of ETH 185,000 and BTC 250, which is equivalent to USD 2 million. This represents 15% of total crypto-asset deposits held by Gatecoin. So far, the forensic investigation has identified the wallet addresses used by the hackers"

The site's twitter account indicated the website and API would be offline while the extent of the hack was investigated.

Hoaxtoshi Continues Swindling Media

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Craig Steven Wright (WOT: nonperson) has reportedly hosted an event with reporters from various fiat media outlets where he faked signing a string with an early coinbase transaction in order to be declared actual Satoshi. For this ruse Hoaxtoshi took an existing transaction signed by the key credited in the block 9 coinbase transaction and acted as though he was signing at the event even though the signature had been actually produced long ago by the key's actual owner. Because of the positions the low quality rubes Hoaxtoshi selected for his audience hold in the fiat media order there are declarations that Hoaxtoshi is the actual Satoshi appearing in various news syndication channels including the BBC and CBS radio. These rubes were very understanding of the fact that Hoaxtoshi apparently couldn't actually move any coins because "the trust actually owns them"(TM)(R).