Infamous fiat institution Wells Fargo bank has been fined over $100 million USD by The Consumer Financial Protection Bureau for "the widespread illegal practice of secretly opening unauthorized deposit and credit card accounts." The bank stands accused of allowing thousands of employees to open more than 2 million unauthorized deposit and credit accounts in secret, in order to hit sales targets, according to investigators. Fines and penalties imposed in the case total $185 million USD, with an additional $5 million being required to be paid as restitution to affected customers. Wells Fargo officials said managers and employees involved in the scheme had been fired, and that $2.6 million dollars in customer fees collected as a result of the deceptive activities has been refunded. Wells Fargo & Co is the fourth largest U.S. bank by assets, and the U.S. Treasury still holds warrants to buy about 110 million shares related to the 2008 financial crisis and bailout.
Past Dropbox Use Casts Spectre
A hack that occurred nearly four years ago is coming back to haunt Dropbox, with the data now appearing for sale on a darknet marketplace. Dropbox only announced the breach last week, notifying the affected users that the company would be resetting their passwords. The data reportedly includes the email addresses and hashed passwords that were obtained in the 2012 hack, which Dropbox officials blamed on an employee's reused password. The vendor is offering the trove for a mere 2 BTC making it likely that many of salted and hashed passwords have not yet been decrypted. Either that or after the Peace trove, passwords are cheap. Him in our time
The Presiglassial Ceiling
Even a cursory review of the beta press readily uncovers overwhelming levels of white knight butthurt in the face of the slow, crushing realisation that an allegedly-black-certainly-male candidate is significantly more acceptable to the general public than an allegedly-female-certainly-white one.
Is there such a thing as white knight rage? Sorry for your balls? Sorry for your awls?
Black Man Shot In North Saint Louis County
Darren Seals, a black man, was found shot to death in a car in North Saint Louis county. This is not an uncommon occurrence aside from the fact that Seals' cadaver was discovered in the car after first responders arrived because it was on fire. Young black men being found shot motor vehicles is typical for the area, but the motor vehicles carrying the deceased to beyond are rarely on fire. Usually the only vehicles found locally on fire are police cars.
Seals was a face of the 2014 civil unrest in Ferguson Missouri Black Lives Matter movement and is reported to recently have held an event on "Facebook Live" where alleged local agents of oppression drew firearms on him for the crime of walking near a suicide investigation. Peace in our time.
Hussein Bahamas Cancels Duterte Meeting At ASEAN Over Hurt Feelings
A planned meeting at ASEAN between United States Oval Office bench warmer Hussein Bahamas and Phillipine President Rodrigo Duterte has been cancelled over Duterte's refusal to be lectured by Bahamas over so called "human rights" with Duterte rejecting Hussein Bahamas as "a son of a whore." The mainstream press in the United States is spinning this clearly mutual decision not to meet as Hussein Bahamas cancelling the meeting. This is the second major show of weakness on the international stage by Hussein Bahamas this week.
Peace in our time.
Brazzers Hacked, ~800,000 User Records Leaked
Following a hack on an online forum run by the pop-pornographers at Brazzers email addresses, usernames, and passwords of ~800,000 Brazzers users have been leaked. Sorry for your loss.
Bankrupt Hanjin Desperately Fighting To Prevent Seizure Of Ships
Shipping giant Hanjin filed for receivership in South Korea and filed for bankruptcy in the United States last week after its finances collapsed. This week news is emerging that Hanjin is trying to file for bankruptcy protection in 40 different jurisdictions as they desperately work to prevent any more of their ships from being seized in port. Hanjin operated the world's seventh largest container line at a loss in four of the last five years. The number of Hanjin ships which have been denied access to ports stands at 79. Hanjin claims a fleet of 141 ships, of which 128 are operating. Spot shipping prices on routes conveying cargo from Asia to North America have been holding ~40% higher than they were immediately before Hanjin's initial bankruptcy filing. The firm's current crisis follows the recent refusal of creditors to lend Hanjin any more capital to finance its operating expenses. Sorry for your loss.
Bahamas G20 Landing Brouhaha
United States Oval Office seat warmer Hussein Bahamas after arriving in Hangzhou, China for the G20 conference disembarked from his plane using the belly staircase rather than a roll up staircase. De-planing Air Force One by the more common roll up staircase indicates confidence in the security of the de-planing situation and indicates a positive relationship between parties to the landing and de-planing.
By contrast a belly staircase de-planing indicates tension between parties and a lack of confidence defined by feelings of insecurity. The official verified Twitter account of the United States Defense Intelligence Agency made light of the tension by tweeting "Classy as always China" and linking a New York Times piece about the tense situation featuring a full frontal picture of Hussein Bahamas engaged in belly de-planing. The tweet making light of Hussein Bahamas' engagement in a supremely submissive act has already been deleted. Peace in our time.
Not Quite News Roundup Xtend 4 (TM)(R)
Welcome to the fourth edition of the Qntra Not Quite News Roundup Xtend (TM)(R). The below events are alleged to have happened, but they are innocent of newsworthiness. Continue reading
California Plans Anti-Cattle Legislation
California lawmakers are targeting cows in their latest front on "Global Warming". Democratic Senator Ricardo Lara, author of the legislation, blames bovine flatulence and manure for producing copious amounts of methane emissions and seeks to send current levels to 40 percent below their 2013 levels by the year 2030. Senate Republicans mostly opposed the measure, which passed near the end of the legislative session Wednesday in Sacramento, claiming it will harm local dairy businesses and cause increased milk prices.