United States President Donald Trump announced that he will be ending a military policy embraced by the Hussein Bahamas administration which involved announcing the specific details of military plans months before the planned operations were to be undertaken.
Majority Black Ferguson Missouri Re-Elects White Man As Mayor
Ferguson, the majority black suburb of Saint Louis, Missouri has re-elected white man James Knowles III to a third term as mayor. Knowles was challenged by black woman and former Mary Kay sales professional Ella Jones who ran on a "Black Lives Matter" platform in the city where Knowles response to black civil unrest is alleged to have sparked the "Black Lives Matter" movement. Since the August 2014 shooting which was latched on to by the Fake News media who canonized the late Michael Brown as a saint, black lives have not seemed to particularly increase in significance among the local community. Two thirds of Ferguson's population is black and Knowles was re-elected by 56 percent of the ballots cast in the election.
Hussein Bahamas Advisor Susan Rice Fingered As Surveillance To Political Operatives Conduit
Numerous sources are fingering Hussein Bahamas advisor Susan Rice as the conduit who carried so called "incidentally collected" surveillance on US President Trump and his associates to the rest of Hussein Bahamas political operatives. Jeff Bezos run fake news outlets under the "Washington Post" label are predictably running pieces alleging that not only did Susan Rice not do such a thing, but she should have because it would be "Right, Good, and Proper"(TM)(R).1
The same outlets have run a piece of speculative fiction supposing an American "Reichstag Fire" which would subvert the "rule of law" pretense. Unfortunately the piece was published 5684 days after September 11, 2001. ↩
Shinohai's Shitcoin Roundup Xtend: Ver's Second Coming, PiTato Drama, Hash Shenanigans
- Buttcoin Unlimited fork supporters are still waiting for the second coming of their altcoin Jesus Roger Ver, hoping he makes good on a promise to trade all of his actual Bitcoins for BCU tokens on Buttfinex at a 1:1 ratio. A reddit user claiming to control an address with 40,000 BTC made the deal with the shitcoin slinger over a week ago, though the deal has to be finalized, likely due to the whole "deal" being nothing more than a social engineering attempt to shore up prices and support. Prices of the BCU tokens at the time of this article were sitting at 0.14 BTC per and a stagnant volume of less than 20 BTC in trading.
- Reddit users finally start to suspect that, just maybe, 21co is nothing more than shit-as-a-service, with one user noting the only thing to come out of $121.5 million USD in venture capital funding being a paid inbox service and a $400 Raspberry Pi doorstop with no case and software cloned from other repositories on Github. (archived)
- Syscoin announced it had received Microshit Azure product certification for 3 "blockchain technology" products, after initially partnering with the altcoin developers a year ago. The hope is that they can sell their particular brand of blockchain snakeoil as enterprise services, although users would likely be better off just using MySQL in the first place.
- An unknown prankster hacked mining pools antpool, viabtc, and btctop and redirected the hashpower to f2pool. f2pool owner Wang Chun reported that their hashrate "Doubled Instantly". (archived)
US Infrastructure Today: Trump's EPA Saves California Agriculture And Vagrants Drop Atlanta Bridge
Events of the past week have done much to illuminate the state of US "Infrastructure" to the extent such a thing pretends to exist.
- Substantial protest circulated among the media when Trump's EPA head Scott Pruitt decided not to implement new rules which would prohibit the agricultural use of the organophosphate pesticide chlorpyrifos. Chorpyrifos, while neurotoxic in humans, is a crucial part of sustaining California's pretense as the "salad bowl" of the United States.The fake news media has dedicated zero time to thanks directed towards the Trump administration by produce growers and merchants.
- In Atlanta a fire which lead to a highway bridge collapse is being attributed to vagrants. Local officials credit bulk storage of PVC pipes under the bridge as providing substantial fuel for the vagrant nuisance conflagration to grow to the point it collapsed the bridge. Three arrests have been made among the local homeless population. These same local officials expect the replacement of 700 feet of highway to take months.
- Deputy White House Chief of Staff Katie Walsh has been reassigned from the White House to work on a campaign fundraising gig. Katie Walsh has been subject to rumours of serving as a source for the fake news media's delusionist social engineering campaigns.
Qntra (S.QNTR) March 2017 Report
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On deedbot
The DAO Is Still Empty: Slock.it Derps Claim Anon Investor Interest
An anonymous investor, evidently accustomed to flushing his money down toilets, has given $2 million USD to failed DAO creators slock.it in order to hire five new "developers" to build a "Universal Sharing Network". The goal of the project is to use smart contracts to monetize the "Internet of Things". Neckbeard Stephan Tual, who somehow still has the job as COO of slock.it stated:
"The smart contracts that we’re going to write as part of the USN are going to be written keeping in mind all the lessons that we’ve learned from The DAO, both in terms of how to write smart contracts, how to keep them safe."
Tual went on to detail a due-diligence process which included an auditing process that must detail where the company will spend funds and what, if anything, the founders have accomplished besides losing millions of dollars and writing shitware on top of an already buggy and unreliable platform. Mr. Tual, however, persists in the delusion that their security is top notch, telling CoinDesk: "There’s going to be top-notch security around the stuff and who’s in a better place to do it than us?". Criticisms regarding the platform and the slock.it team's track record were dismissed as simply foolish talk perpetuated by internet trolls.
Five Percent Increase In Latest Bitcoin Mining Difficulty Adjustment
As commonly happens Bitcoin mining difficulty increased yet again for another all time high. The difficulty went from 475705205061.62921143 to 499635929816.66754150 for a change of ~5.0305787 percent.
DNC Follows Clitler's Lead, Fires Entire Staff
Tom "Tommy Gun" Perez, as newly elected Chairman of the Democratic National Committee (DNC), has formally requested the resignation letters of all current staffers by April 15th, 2017. New positions will be selected by a 30-member Transition Advisory Committee composed of DNCers who will thereafter be ineligible in El Senor's new administration.
Contrary to any presumption about how sweet, safe, and care-free it is to live on the dole of the she-state, this DNC debacle demonstrates once again that nothing could be further from the truth.
Sorry for your leftism, holmes.
US Securities Regulator Denies Another "Paper Bitcoin" Trading Instrument
The United States Securities and Exchange Commission (WOT:unpersons) has denied a petition by a venture calling itself "SolidX" (WOT:nonpersons) to trade a paper security simulating Bitcoin on US markets. This follows the same group's denial of a similar petition by the Winkelvii (WOT:unregistered eukaryote) to list a paper simulated Bitcoin instrument. Sorry for your laws.