Over the several hours since actual votes started being counted the New York Times forecast has shifted from an ~80% chance of a Hillary Rodham-Clinton (WOT:nonperson) victory to an 87% chance Donald Trump-Clinton (WOT:nonperson) wins the presidency. The Trumpreich is night!
Category Archives: Altcoins
Coinbase Partnering Up For Facial Verification As Relevance Continues Sinking
Coinbase has partnered with a bio-metrics firm to enable facial recognition of customers as part of KYC compliance measures. (archived)
Officials from Jumio stated:
“Adding bio-metric facial recognition to Netverify was inspired by a need that impacts organizations across many industries, especially financial services with account opening and money transfers,” said Jumio CEO Stephen Stuut. “As evidenced by the millions of unauthorized accounts that were opened at Wells Fargo, it’s critical to look beyond existing multi-factor authentication solutions whenever any digital transaction takes place. The addition of biometric facial recognition, combined with ID verification, will not only help ensure that the individual in front of the screen is who they say they are.”
Coinbase is touted on the site as giving "customers a secure and seamless way for both investment managers and consumers to trade and exchange Bitcoin or Ethereum for traditional currency." Customers can have total confidence that their data and funds are 100% safe in the vaults of Buterin's waterfall.
Soylent's Attempt To Scapegoat Soy Sinks
Rob Reinhart's1 (WOT:nonperson) food replacement start up Soylent is suffering in the wake of a severe product purity scandal. Early efforts at damage control involved Soylent blaming the soy content of their products and alleging the violently ill customers must have had some sort of previously undetected soy sensitivity.
The culprit was "algal flour" derived from Chlorella protothecoides grown in fermenters. The algae was chosen for its high protein content and while it is classified by US regulators as a "Generally Recognized As Safe" substance it's use as a source of dietary protein is not well tested. Digestive intolerance of unfamiliar plant proteins is not an uncommon class of phenomena, though contamination of the product is also a possibility.
This is bullish for soy's continued reign as the cheapest complete protein of vegetable origin suitable for keeping the general population fed. Soy for your loss.
Otherwise notable for the nuisance complaints filed by his neighbors related to his habit of hoarding piles of trash which attract vermin. ↩
Clinton Thug Janet Reno Dies
Janet Reno, lead prosecutor of the first Clinton Administration's war on the American people has died. Janet oversaw terrorist campaigns against numerous victims including a the Branch Davidians, Montana Freemen, Richard Jewell, Wen Ho Lee, and an uncountable number of others. Her tenure as Attorney General opened with the immolation of 76 members of a religion of peace. Reno's cause of death is listed simply as "complications of Parkinson's disease" without further details being provided.
Not Quite News Roundup Xtend 13 (TM)(R)
Welcome to the thirteenth edition of the Qntra Not Quite News Roundup Xtend (TM)(R). The below events are alleged to have happened, but they are decidedly innocent of newsworthiness.
- After 108 years the Chicago Cubs won the World Series1 against the Cleveland Indians.
- CNN fired contributor and interim Democratic party chair Donna Brazile for leaking debate questions to the Hillary Rodham-Clinton campaign.
- Rumours of China banning Bitcoin tempered the recent bull run reported by fiat/Bitcoin interfaces though after settling it still requires ~711 United States dollars to acquire a whole Bitcoin via this route.
- Enthusiasm for the Zcash/Z-Cash/ZNC altcoin has already faded as scheduled. Who knew it would only take another week of mining subsidies hitting the market to crash the price?
- Donald Trump-Clinton was rushed off the campaign stage in Reno, Nevada by the Secret Service.
- Playboy Playmate Dani Mathers faces charges relating to a "body shaming" incident.
- The University of Missouri Football team lost their 11th consecutive game in conference play. The team is now set to lose every game in their conference for the first time since 1971. This follow the University surrendering to a strike by the football team last year.
Despite the name this is not an international contest. In the last World Baseball Classic, an actual international contest, the Dominican Republic won while the United States was eliminated by Puerto Rice, an island it occupies. ↩
Coincidences Today: Police Officers Being Shot In Pairs
This week pairs of police officers have been shot in Des Moines, Iowa; Arnold, Missouri; and New York City. Police officers are the demographic group in the United States whose members are least likely to vote for Hillary "Clitler" Rodham-Clinton on November 8th. Peace in our Time.
Hillary Bro'd Out With Epstein On Sex Island Six Times!
The Hillary Rodham-Clinton email story continues to get juicier as it appears that an NYPD investigation of Huma Weiner's husband (archived) played a critical role in forcing the FBI's hand. Per Erik Prince (WOT:nonperson) of the mercenary company formerly known as Blackwater:
There is all kinds of criminal culpability through all the emails they’ve seen of that 650,000, including money laundering, underage sex, pay-for-play, and, of course, plenty of proof of inappropriate handling, sending/receiving of classified information, up to SAP level Special Access Programs
Underage sex refers of course to six trips by Hillary Rodham-Clinton to pedophile Jeffery Epstein's child sex island. Bill made more than 20 trips.
Prince further suggests that by only enjoying indirect "Clinton Priviledge" Huma Abedin faces substantial jail time for her work as Hillary's aide, and the great impediment to prosecutions has so far been the political Hussein Bahamas "Justice" Department. The "Justice" Department is refusing to convene grand juries based on the FBI's investigations, and blackmailing the NYPD with James Lafond presents Baltimore and Ferguson style inquisitions if they pursue charges.
No progress has been made in allowing International Election observers to oversee the integrity of the election.
El Paso Fiat Payments MITM'd 3.2 Million United States dollar SFYL
City officials in El Paso Texas disclosed on Wednesday that they had fallen prey to an email phishing scam that resulted in a 3.2 million United States dollar sorry for your loss. The city became aware of scam in October after a vendor informed the city that it had not been paid for work involving a streetcar project, with the money instead having been routed to fraudulent bank accounts. Employees have reverted to issuing paper checks in the meantime to thwart further attempts at social engineering. An attorney for the city stated that some of the funds had been recovered by law enforcement, though few details were given due to the ongoing investigation as to how the thefts occurred – but now that the Nigerian Prince has been paid hope is that the rest of the fortune will arrive in their coffers soon.
Hillary Rodham-Clinton Child Trafficking Connections On Track To Hit Mainstream News Tomorrow
Haitian child abductor and trafficker Laura Silsby's connections to Hillary Rodham-Clinton and Huma Weiner are on track to enter the mainstream news cycle tomorrow.1 Silsby and others operating under cover as "missionaries" used the aftermath of the 2010 Haitian earthquake in order to steal black children. Several wikileaked emails show that Hillary Rodham-Clinton was involved in saving Silsby from the Haitian legal system following Silby's arrest for the aforementioned child theft and trafficking. Sorry for your lulz.
Timing based on 31337 proprietary Qntra social media to news talking head verbal diarrhoea forecasting technology. ↩
Soy And Corn Yields Massive, Prices Depressed Further
This year's US soy crop has been referred to as a "bin buster" and potentially record setting with substantial acreage still waiting in the field for harvest. Corn yield have been good too. This news is dismal for farmers, but delightful for dicamba. Landscape accordingly because the future is now.