Author Archives: Aaron 'BingoBoingo' Rogier

The "Your Loss" Playbook

Posted on by

Before we at Qntra can be sorry for your loss, someone else has to bake your loss first.When a "business" decides to live at the intersection of Bitcoin money and fiat currencies your loss tends to follow the same few steps. There may be a few variation on these steps depending on whether your chosen loser is BitInstant, MtGox, Mcxnow, Homero Garza, Buterin,1 or Bitfinex.

  1. Make, buy, or steal a thing to be calling your business. If you are a true pioneer like Intersango you make it. You buy it if you are Mt Gox or Butterfly Labs. If you are Bitfinex you just straight up steal it.2
  2. You start making noise. If you are Trendon Shavers you recruit "privileged insiders" to do your selling. If you are Butterfly Labs you buy a bunch of advertising. If you are Homero Garza you buy advertising from all the media outlets and do a bit of the privileged insider thing.
  3. You build some history for either spectacular returns and reliability. You paper over the complaints with lies and declarations of "This is just how we do things" to justify the insanity. You lean on your loyal bought and paid for noisemakers3 to toe your party line.
  4. Your Loss, we are sorry.4
  5. When the complaints get too loud the payment processor and all manner of accessories to the scheme start getting scapegoated. Mt Gox had Dwolla. BitInstant had numerous payment processors to blame. At this point the existence of the loss is clear, but some effort is made to conceal the loss is yours.
  6. Tokens! A market for them! See MtGox Bitcoins on Bitcoin Builder, BFX Tokens on Bitfinex, and the entire Paycoin scheme that emerged when GAW could no longer hold up the pretense of mining.
  7. The pretense is suddenly lifted. Every one is sorry for your loss.

History rhymes and this is the story of your losses. Just like the various color revolutions, your loss follows a pattern. We're sorry.

  1. The various altcoin scams invariably end up actually being fiat/Bitcoin interface scams when the scammers need to eat off of customer deposits and pimp their rides. ↩

  2. preferably from another scam that too moribund to care at the time  ↩

  3. Roger Ver and Andreas Derpolopolis are very popular and affordable choices.  ↩

  4. The steps following this case can be skipped in the event of Trendon Shavers  ↩

Bitfinex Freezes US Customer Accounts Following Another Loss

Posted on by

Reports are emerging that Bitfinex account holders in the United States have had their accounts frozen. They are powerless to trade and more importantly withdraw funds from Bitfinex. The present scapegoat appears to be a dispute between Bitfinex and the payment provider Synapse pay who services their United States customers. A loss is allegedly at the center of this dispute. Sorry for yours.

Not Quite News Roundup Xtend (TM)(R)

Posted on by

Welcome to the Qntra Not quite News Roundup Xtend (TM)(R). Below are collected things that happened this week which did not independently achieve newsworthiness:

  • The United States Marshalls service announced another auction, this time only ~3 Bitcoins constituting the pot were stolen from Ross Ulbrict. The remainder come from other cases.
  • Gawker Media has celebrated their last week before becoming part of Ziff Davis by pantomiming the high school tradition of "Senior Week" and by opening an online "Men's Magazine" called "The Cuck." The Cuck's first post was:

    The Politics of Sitting Down To Pee

  • Bitfinex reopened trading as was planned. Trading included their non-consensual debt instrument.
  • Tradehill's Jared Kenna opened yet another Bitcoin "dark trading" pool.
  • Coinbase has continued their apology and solvency tour repeatedly offering that the number of Classic Ethereum tokens they lost was 40,000 United States dollars, a number denominated in a unit other than that of the actual things they lost.
  • The Huffington Post's David Seaman started off a round of Herpity Derping that supposes Barry Silbert did Ethereum Classic.
  • Barry Silbert's Coindesk announced plans to double its staff (archived).

Man Jailed After Allegedly Spiking Utah Police Sergeant's Lemonade

Posted on by

A fast food worker remains jailed after a police sergeant in Layton, Utah alleges the man "spiked" his lemonade with methamphetamine and tetrahydrocannabinol (archived). While methamphetamine is water soluble and capable of entering into solution with lemonade, tetrahydrocannabinol is incapable of entering into solution with water strongly suggesting that if tetrahydrocannabinol appeared on the Sergeant's drug screen it is because he likes to get himself high. Continue reading →

Alleged Orlando Shooter's Father Seated Behind Hillary At Rally

Posted on by

Alleged Orlando shooter Omar Mateen's (WOT:nonperson) father was prominently seated behind Hillary Rodham-Clinton (WOT:nonperson) at a political rally in Kissimmee, Florida. Omar Matteen's father Seddique Mir Mateen (WOT:nonperson) left Afghanistan in the 1970's and has for years produced a number of videos where he claims the title "Revolutionary President of Afghanistan." There has been no mention in the mainstream media about how Hillary's ties to an insurgent leader may affect her relationship as president with the presently US backed government of Ashraf Ghani (WOT:nonperson) in Afghanistan.

Former Illinois Governor Loses Convictions But Keeps Prison Sentence

Posted on by

Former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich (WOT:nonperson) was cleared on 5 of the 18 charges he was convicted of though his 14 year prison sentence was maintained in full during a re-sentencing hearing today. Blagojevich was the Governor of Illinois and the de facto head of the Democratic party in that state when Hussein Bahamas was allowed to move from the Illinois State Senate to the United States Senate and eventually the United States Presidency.

As the sitting Governor of the Illinois Blagojevich was arrested when sloppy operational security exposed the auction he was holding to sell Hussein's vacant United States Senate seat. He is scheduled to be released in May 2024 during the second term of either Hillary Rodham-Clinton or Donald Trump-Clinton's presidency. Blagojevich became a politician when his amateur boxing career ended following a loss by technical knock out in the 1975 Chicago Golden Gloves tournament. Sorry for your laws.

Merkel Regime To Broaden Issuance Of Driving Bans In Germany

Posted on by

Reports are emerging that the Angela Merkel regime in Germany is prepared to push through new legislation that would make drivers license revocation a common sanction for non-driving related "crimes" against the Zher majesty the EuroFührer Angela Merkel. While much of the public justification for the new measures involve detering youth crime (archived), suggested offenses include failing to pay child support as an absentee parent. Naturally the measure would be used to punish dissidents as "hate speech" would be similarly subject to driving license revocation. The new motoring sanctions would be levelled in combination with the EuroFührer's most popular sanction, the suspended prison sentence. This adds to the threat of arbitrary imprisonment for violating the sentence's suspension1 further punishment in the form of travel restrictions. Sorry for your laws, but papers please.

  1. Because why judicially imprison someone after trial when you can administratively imprison them later.  ↩

Eulora 0.1.2 Update Released, Record Loot Follows

Posted on by

Earlier this week the Ministry of Games released version 0.1.2 of their real cash economy MMORPG Eulora to the world. The new client software was made available July 31st and the servers rolled over to the new version on August 3rd. Shortly after the update was made available Daniel P. Barron (WOT:danielpbarron) found a record setting loot pop in the game world. The drop composed of boulders and assorted other loot has a base value of 0.81 Bitcoins with a potentially higher market value in the game's real money economy. Eulora's real cash economy makes it one of several avenues available for earning Bitcoin without dealing with the AML/KYC indignity of the various fiat/Bitcoin interfaces.

Monsanto On Dicamba Drift Disaster: We Are Not An Enforcement Agency, To Argentina: We Are An Enforcement Agency

Posted on by

In response to growing tensions over Monsanto's Dicamba resistant soybeans tempting farmers to use Dicamba and wilting neighboring soybean fields along with the occasional stand of trees,1 Monsanto's response through a representative of the company is:

“We understand the EPA is investigating and Monsanto is supporting that work.”

Richard: “The thing I want to underline is we, as a company, aren’t an enforcement agency. We’re confident that the state officials will be evaluating the complaints, will investigate and will take appropriate actions.

“As a company, we can’t speculate on what action government officials will take – especially those who are investigating complaints of misuse. I’m sure they’re working diligently and will be taking action.”

– Monsanto Representative to Delta Farm News (archived)

By contrast when Argentina refused to follow Monsanto's exacting instructions in an attempt to enforce dubious and expiring patents, acting as an enforcement agency Monsanto embargoed Argentina.

For all the pain market forces are continuing to heap on the value of the corn crop, the soy crop this year is on track to produce nothing but losers. On one side will be farmers with a spectacular haul burdened by torts and on the other are farmers who went through the expense of planting only to harvest wilt if they don't end up tilling the field under. Sorry for your loss.

  1. On a recent country drive numerous stands of deciduous trees near farms appeared to have been experiencing profound stress disproportionate to this summer's heat. ↩

Louisiana Enacts and New York Considers Protecting Law Enforcement With Hate Crime Laws

Posted on by

A new trend emerging in regional legislatures governing subdivisions of the United States are efforts to protect "law enforcement" officers by passing "Blue Lives Matters" laws making attacks on police subject to enhanced penalties as "hate" crimes. Apparently the existing mechanism for enhanced penalties, which work because attacking a "law enforcement" officer is already its own unique additional criminal charge, aren't working. Tensions between "law enforcement" and the public are high for a number of reasons. Peace in our time.